Canadian anthem of spurned spouses switches networks

The entire 2004–2005 NHL season was cancelled due to a lockout. In 2005, Canada’s fertility rate reached its highest level in many years. The only people who can’t see the link between these two facts are the hockey obsessed. The nation’s wives and girlfriends—who can never get their men to bed on a chilly Saturday night—understand the connection intimately. And Dolores Claman’s “The Hockey Theme” is the clarion call that summons the men and plunks them down in front of their set. As national anthems go, Claman’s song swells us with patriotism and little else. Put another way, that stupid song is the Pavlovian bell that leaves the entire nation unmanned. And now TSN, which typically airs hockey several nights per week instead of just on Saturdays, holds the rights to the song. Get ready for a long, cold winter.