Real Weddings: Zarmina and Aaron

Zarmina Shafton (née Khan), a 30-year-old registered psychotherapist, met Aaron Shafton, a 29-year-old fintech executive, on Hinge in 2018. By July of 2020, the couple had moved in together, and in May of 2023, they got engaged while on vacation in Italy. Eager to keep their nuptials intimate and low-key, Khan and Shafton eloped in Las Vegas on the sixth anniversary of their first meeting, with Lady Elvis officiating and two photographers as their only witnesses. Here’s how it all came together.

Aaron: The biggest accomplishment of my life was Zarmina sending the first like on Hinge. I think that’s when I peaked.

Zarmina: Aaron will never let that go. I thought his profile was funny! I remember he wrote something about not knowing how to fold a fitted sheet properly, which made me laugh. And I thought he was cute too.

Aaron: I liked everything about Zarmina’s profile. I thought she was funny and beautiful. When we started messaging each other, the connection was instant. We had good banter. I moved pretty quickly to ask her out on a first date. We started chatting on a Sunday, and our first date was the following Thursday.

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Zarmina: I’d only been on Hinge for a month or two, and it was my first time using a dating app. Aaron was the first dating-app date I went on. We met up for a picnic at Trinity Bellwoods Park. Aaron brought snacks, and I brought wine.

Aaron: We talked for hours and hours. Rather than letting the night end, we kept it going at a new location. I found myself really trying to impress. Bar Raval felt right, so we did a venue change for drinks.

Zarmina: I was living with my parents in Mississauga at the time, since I’d just moved back home after finishing my undergrad at Western, so Aaron walked me back to Union Station to get the train home. We finished our date with street hot dogs from a cart across the station.

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Aaron: Zarmina and I kept meeting up and going on dates after that. We’d go out to dinner in Toronto, and I’d take the GO train to hang out with her in Mississauga. We like to joke that getting on the GO train for a date is the modern-day equivalent of riding out on a horse. Zarmina’s birthday was not long after we met, so I took her out for it.

Zarmina: A few weeks after we met, I had a three-week grad trip in Europe planned with a friend. Aaron and I hung out non-stop up until the trip. We were in touch the whole time I was away, texting and doing video calls.

Aaron: When Zarmina came back from her trip, she came straight over to my place. It was then that I declared myself her boyfriend.

Zarmina: I think we both felt the same way about each other at the same time, and things just kept going from there. I was starting a master’s degree at U of T in September while living with my parents, so we did medium-distance for a year before I moved to Dufferin and College with roommates in the summer of 2019.

Aaron: I was living with my parents at the time, at Dupont and Ossington. When Covid hit, I unofficially moved in with Zarmina and bubbled up with her roommates. We moved into our own place in July of 2020.

Zarmina: It was a tiny shoebox of an apartment at King and Spadina. We had adopted our first dog, Caesar, a few months after we moved in, and we quickly realized our place was too small for the three of us. We didn’t love the neighborhood, either. So, in the summer of 2021, we moved to a bigger place at Dundas and Ossington. Sadly, Caesar passed away that winter. We ended up getting another rescue dog, Spoon, a few weeks after that.

Aaron: I knew early on that I could see myself building a life around Zarmina. She’s so gorgeous and intelligent and kind. We have a very similar sense of humour. She loves life, and I loved that her job as a psychotherapist was helping people. She’s a very caring and giving person.

Zarmina: There are so many great qualities about Aaron. From the moment we met, I could tell we were aligned on the big things: politics, social issues, world events, and the types of relationships we want to have with our friends and family. We were on the same page about the small things too: we both love travelling, have expensive taste in restaurants—we’re big foodies—and we love animals.

Aaron: It’s hard to say when Zarmina and I started thinking more seriously about marriage. As time passed, we started seeing more couples around us getting married, and we started thinking about it more ourselves. I began to feel strongly about getting Zarmina a big piece of jewellery. In the summer of 2022, we’d been together long enough that it felt like the right time to start thinking about popping the question.

Zarmina: I actually never thought I’d get married, but Aaron was the first person I met who I could see myself building a life with. He made me realize marriage was something I wanted. It started as a joke, but in the fall of 2022, I started sending him pictures of engagement rings I liked. We went ring shopping together a few times, and I found a design I loved: a solitaire elongated cushion-cut diamond.

Aaron: Zarmina kept on telling me how much she loved the design. “Elongated cushion cut” was tattooed into my brain. As I die, those will be my final words. I had the ring ready by April of 2023. We had planned a trip to Italy a month later, where I planned to propose in Florence, at a flower garden below the Piazzale Michelangelo, which overlooks the city. I hired an Italian photographer to capture the moment. But, the morning of, it hailed in Florence for the first time in 15 years. The photographer messaged me asking if we should move it inside. The latest weather forecast said it would clear up by the afternoon—and thankfully it did. So the proposal happened exactly as I’d envisioned. We saw the view and walked over to the garden, and I asked a “stranger” (the photographer I’d hired) to take a picture of us. Then I went down on one knee and out popped the ring.

Zarmina: I blacked out completely. I was so overwhelmed but so happy. I loved that the proposal was just the two of us. Aaron planned a really nice dinner for us afterward. Then we FaceTimed everyone. It was a really exciting day.

Aaron: Zarmina and I went back and forth for a long time about what to do for our wedding. We knew we didn’t want a big traditional wedding. It didn’t feel like us. We considered variations, like a courthouse wedding followed by a dinner with friends, or booking a restaurant for a dozen people. We got rough quotes from restaurants. One place on Ossington that I won’t name asked for $65,000. So we struck that idea out. Wedding planning was starting to feel stressful.

Zarmina: Meanwhile, I reached out to book a photographer-videographer couple, Ryanne Hollies and Brjánn Bettencourt. I’d had their social pages bookmarked since before we got engaged. We knew that, whatever we did for our wedding, we wanted great photos and videos. We thought it would be nice to get married on the anniversary of our first date, July 12, so we booked them for that date in 2024. It’s the only thing we ever booked.

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Aaron: The idea of a destination elopement came up. We loved that we could do it like our engagement and have it be just the two of us, plus our photographers as our witnesses. Zarmina reached out to Ryanne and Brjánn to see if they’d be up for travelling, which they were. We started to get excited about wedding planning again, which felt like a good sign. As we moved away from the idea of a traditional wedding—and then even past a small get-together—it seemed like an interesting idea to “plan out” the stereotypical super quick, reckless wedding.

Zarmina: We thought about where people go to elope, and Vegas came to mind as a classic. We found a chapel in Vegas called Sure Thing. It’s kind of kitschy, campy, fun and playful, which suited us.

Aaron: What we’re generally trying to do, whether it’s parties, decor or fashion, is mix a sense of elegance with something loud and fun. We like nice things, but we try not to take ourselves too seriously. Something about the old-school Vegas wedding felt like the perfect mix of fun and adventure—something we could dress and be stylish for while still being super romantic.

Zarmina: We love all things kitsch, from the tchotchkes all over our house to our kitschy Christmas decor around the holidays. The Sure Thing chapel was perfect for us. It was romantic and charming.

Aaron: Our families were both fine with us eloping. My parents didn’t have a big wedding themselves, and Zarmina’s brother had had a big traditional wedding, so her family already got to experience that.

Zarmina: I knew I didn’t want a traditional white dress for my wedding. I wanted something that was fun and interesting. I came across a photo of a celebrity—I can’t for the life of me remember who—wearing a black-and-white tuxedo-inspired dress from Shushu/Tong, and I loved it immediately. It had an off-the-shoulder silhouette, a cinched waist and a puffy skirt. I wore it with blue shoes as my “something blue.”

Aaron: Zarmina and I throw a black-tie Christmas party for our friends every year. A few years ago, I found a vintage Armani tuxedo in Kensington Market that was just my size. I’d worn it to a few of our Christmas parties and figured it would be perfect for our wedding. I paired it with a velvet bowtie.

Zarmina: Our trip was pretty quick—just two nights. We flew into Vegas the evening before we were scheduled to have our ceremony, checked into the Wynn Hotel and ordered room service. Just before midnight, we went to a government office to get our marriage licence—they were open 24 hours a day. There weren’t as many weddings in line as we thought. It was pretty empty. They gave us a pair of souvenir luggage tags that say “I got married in Vegas,” which we still use.

Aaron: The next day, Zarmina and I had breakfast and wrote our vows together. I went to pick up a baby-blue vintage-looking wedding cake that we’d ordered from a bakery. Then the photographers arrived and we went to the chapel. We were in and out in 30 minutes. Lady Elvis was our officiant, and she did a great job. She made us promise never to take each other to the Heartbreak Hotel.

Zarmina: I was very emotional the whole day, more than I was expecting to be. I was crying that morning as we were writing our vows, then I cried again when we got to the chapel and yet again when we read our vows to each other.

Aaron: Getting married was overwhelming in the moment. The feelings I had for Zarmina really bubbled to the top. I don’t know how people do it in front of a whole audience of their friends and family. I felt so vulnerable. I found myself reflecting on everything we’d ever done together and imagining the rest of our lives. I was so euphoric and excited.

Zarmina: After the ceremony, we went back to our hotel. Our friends had ordered some champagne to our room as a surprise, which was very sweet. We had some cake and took photos at the hotel. Then we went out and spent a couple of hours taking photos around Vegas.

Aaron: We popped into some of the kitschier casinos in Old Vegas. The staff were definitely not happy about us filming in there, especially since we were with two photographers holding, like, five vintage cameras each. We got asked to leave a few times.

Zarmina: As we were walking on the street, a bunch of guys fist-bumped Aaron to congratulate him. There was a real celebratory mood.

Aaron: It was a fun day, but we were running around the desert in 40-degree weather, and I was wearing a black wool tuxedo. We definitely had heat stroke by the end, but it was worth it.

Zarmina: After the photos, we got back to our hotel to clean up and change. We went to dinner at a French restaurant called Le Cirque and had a really nice tasting menu. By the time we got home that night, I felt very tired, but so good about how everything went.

Aaron: I love that Zarmina and I were able to just focus on each other at our wedding. It was a wonderful day. I recommend eloping to everyone. Weddings are great; I love going to them. But there’s just something so special about being able to focus on the one person you’re marrying. It felt very romantic and intimate.

Zarmina: I love that we left a lot of our day’s plans pretty open so we could see how we felt and do what we wanted. We actually had a second late-night reservation booked at a different restaurant, but we were so tired that we cancelled it, went back to the hotel and watched a movie. It felt so relaxed and so like us.

Aaron: We flew back to Toronto the next day, then a day after that, we left for our honeymoon in Guatemala for two weeks.

Zarmina: Getting married hasn’t changed anything in our relationship, except for my last name, which I changed to Aaron’s. It feels the same, but in the best way. Getting to celebrate it has been really beautiful and special.

Aaron: I get so excited calling Zarmina my wife. It gives me a visceral thrill. Getting married felt very much like the natural next chapter of our story.

Cheat Sheet

Date: July 12, 2024 Photography: Ryanne Hollies Videography: Brjánn Batista Bettencourt, 3B Photography Getting-ready venue: The Wynn, Las Vegas Wedding venue: Sure Thing Chapel Officiant: Lady Elvis Florals: Lucid Juliet Cake: Mary’s Cakes Zarmina’s dress: Shushu/Tong Aaron’s outfit: Vintage Giorgio Armani