Four Weddings Canada, episode 10: a bride with a serious case of blue balls

We’ve come to learn that wedding themes on Four Weddings Canada rarely come to fruition. This week, however, one of the brides gets her wish: Jenn, who wants nothing more than a regular day out of the spotlight. Sure, she’s on a reality show, but if she doesn’t want a head table, she’s allowed to not have a head table, and if she wants to avoid the stresses of buying things for her wedding by doing all of her shopping on the Internet, that’s cool, too. Of course, the other three brides scrutinize her humble ceremony to shreds, and Jenn walks away with one of the lowest scores (41.5/120) in the history of Four Weddings Canada. Find out why after the jump.
It isn’t typical for us to outright explain something to the brides of this program, but none of the brides, except for 22-year-old Danielle, are familiar with The Little Mermaid, and we have to listen to Michelle, Jenn and Valentina complain about how Danielle’s mermaid-style dress isn’t appropriate for her fairy-tale princess theme for approximately two minutes (it’s a long time for a television show, believe us). So allow us this brief educational digression. Dear brides, meet vivacious redhead Ariel, daughter of King Triton and Queen Athena, and wife of Prince Eric. Clearly, mermaids can be princesses, too. Now, please, not another word.
Back to the Bitch-o-Meter:
Michelle, age 24 (Budget: $36,000)
Michelle’s friends allegedly don’t drink, so she’s comfortable choosing a venue that charges $9 for a mediocre glass of white wine (how thoughtful!). Speaking of thoughts, she can’t seem to grasp why Jenn would have a wedding if not to be the centre of attention. She’s sullen as she discusses the absence of a “lovey-dovey feeling,” which can apparently only be demonstrated with many tears (it is the only way, brides!). Jenn, don’t listen to this bridezilla. Also, Michelle stuffs her face with Danielle’s cheese balls (we admit, they do look delicious).
Danielle, age 22 (Budget: $25,000)
It appears that there is a McDonald’s cheeseburger midnight buffet at Danielle’s reception. While we think it looks mighty tasty, we don’t particularly care for the unbelievable wastefulness at her reception. Many portions of uneaten beef are seen in a busser’s garbage receptacle, because people aren’t looking to die from overeating at a wedding, despite what so many brides seem to think. Danielle hates humble dinners as much as she hates entertainment, including Michelle’s highland dance for her husband and the “freestyle soccer players” at Valentina’s reception (although, in fairness, soccer players? This is not a thing). What she loves: “the blue balls” (the candies at Jenn’s candy bar). Balls are a theme on tonight’s episode.
Valentina, age 29 (Budget: $70,000)
We can tell that Valentina really wants to be this week’s Head Bitch in Ceremony, so we’re going to do the appropriate thing and not give her the title. She really likes decor, and if there isn’t any, she basically freaks out. Not in a mascara-running-down-her-face way (she believes herself to be a royal, after all), but rather in an insufferable-line-of-commentary-about-how-Jenn’s-wedding-is-a-blank-canvas way. She also likes watching Michelle and her husband cry at their wedding, but still finds it “blah” because she, like Michelle, is not a very kind person. No ball-related imagery to report.
Jenn, age 28 (Budget: $17,000)
Jenn is awesome. She feels like a crappy person when she witnesses the food wasted at Danielle’s wedding, she openly mocks the ’80s office chairs at Michelle’s wedding ceremony, and her response to steak is simply, “Damn! Yes.” She refers to the ice cream at Valentina’s reception as “happiness itself” (not in a dippy way, like last week’s Marlena), and she seems to sincerely like many things (the dresses and the food, especially). Any bitchy comments are organic and not made for TV, unlike some other brides we’ve seen (Valentina).

The Hype. Because we’re awesome (and kind of bitchy, sometimes), and the brides this week were kind of lame (except Jenn; we loved her).
(Oh, and Valentina won the honeymoon. She tied with Michelle, but Danielle and Jenn thought Valentina deserved it.)
Jenn IS awesome! We love her, too! :)
Jenn was by far one of the most memorable people this show will ever have. Jenn is awesome. Wish she would have won.
Yeah, kinda think it was revolting how they tore up Jen, who is arguably the most genuinely likable brides to ever be featured on this show. Why would she even sign up for this travesty?
I was also a guest at Jenn’s wedding, and I’ve gotta say: these girls were something else. The show actually does them a favour. You expect a little bit of civility, but, as an example, the one girl (Michelle, I guess was her name) refused to eat her chocolate mousse and whip cream dessert because she insisted that it looked like (I kid you not) “semen and poo”. Then she starting chanting “semen and poo” while we all ate our desserts quietly and tried to ignore her, and the others, and their 12-year-old comments. I was embarrassed for them.
Jenn (even if she is a perfectly lovely person) hired a wedding planner and her wedding STILL didn’t have anything special to note. The brides were vicious and rude, but they always are on this show and nobody should have expected anything different. Jenn getting such a low score is horrible promo for her wedding planner! How sad!
Funny you should mention the wedding planner! Other than running a couple of errands, and trying to get herself on television, the only thing that woman did was take out her stress on members of the bridal party.
Um, Kim — here’s the thing. Firstly, expecting people to be vicious and awful is setting the bar pretty low. Second, some people really are sincere and don’t expect others to be awful. Third, Jenn’s wedding seemed perfectly nice. What’s wrong with low-key? And I’ve been to that venue: the gallery setting is lovely. Her low score doesn’t prove anything aside from the pettiness of the kind of girls who think that a wedding needs padded thrones and capoeira dancers to be meaningful.
I’m a personal friend of Danielle. Neither she nor Jenn wanted Valentina to win, which is what you have stated in The Hype section. From what I’ve read on Danielle’s Facebook, Valentina was the only bride that the other three really didn’t like, but douchebag producers can do anything to twist the views of the audience, yours included. Everyone did, indeed, love Jenn, and she probably deserved to win. Oh, well.
Not sure how you are supposed compare 4 weddings when three of them cost the same as just one wedding. To put Valentina’s wedding against Danielle, Jenn and Michelle’s was just wrong. You had three very normal, budget sensitive weddings against what most people put down as a down payment on a house. The comments made about Danielle’s wedding proves that none of the three had any idea what a princess is or is supposed to look like. Her dress was from the Disney collection – Arielle the princess of the sea. To say that her venue looked like a retirement home is just nasty. Jenn and Michelle both had blah, nothing over the top nothing for me to remember as being overly special. Valentina should not have been against these other three brides – even though the scores were close within the top three hers’ just didn’t fit with the overall picture created by the other three girls.
The scoring on this show from the 3 other brides should be based on what the bride of the wedding that they are attending tries to achieve. You cant pin 4 extremely different brides up against each other and expect them to judge based on their own personal preference. That’s how you get people who lowball because they didnt like something, it wasnt to their standards. Jen was the ONLY one to FULLY achieve what she was going for…if I were the 2 unwinning brides I would have refused to pick between the two…they both won they both should have gone on a honeymoon. If the company is that hard up for cash Jaunt has some pretty sick deals for cuba and mexico they could have accomidated the tie. Just Saying!!! Jens wedding was my favorite…what she went for is what unfolded.
It is difficult to judge 10 minutes of a wedding day, taken from a highly edited viewpoint. It doesn’t matter how much is spent: it is the bride’s day and that should be respected. Remarks about the religous venue, or the officiant, is unacceptable.
This episode rates near the bottom of this inaugural season.My opinion of the “10 minute” weddings so far this year: Episode 8 has been the best to watch. As ridiculous as some of the comments were, the brides did not roast each other, like on some of the other shows.
I agree with Magusspirit on this one…producers twist anything to get a good rating so for people to judge like that based on what they have seen is not a fair thing to do, unless you were to go to all 4 weddings and personally know each of the contenders you have no place to judge, I myself am a huge fan of Danielle’s as well as family and cannot believe how the brides could not even determine who Ariel was which in fact is also a princess as Keith has stated…therefore Valentina to me was the only one with high standards at her wedding the others just wanted something elegant and memorable and no offence but to me Valentina’s wedding was more like a circus…you had her and her husband sitting at their “throne” and you had the court jesters (or in this case soccer players, etc.) there was a lot of thought put in to all of these weddings…Jen and her own ring making was simply devine, Michelle and her dance for her husband simply beautiful, Valentina…well, I think I’ve said all I had to say about her and as for Danielle, she had a beautiful wedding which was something not as common as everyone else’s and it was unique! My own personal opinion I would have picked Danielle but since it came down to the other 2 I would have picked Michelle over Valentina anyday…but then again we don’t know all that was said or done just what we saw…all in all congrats to you all finding the men you want to spend your life with :) <3 ya Danielle <3
We all know no one would watch a show that involves 4 brides going to eachothers weddings and saying how awesome everything is. I’m sure they had plenty of good things to say about the other weddings, but that doesn’t sell as good.
I’m still shocked that with all the half points there was a tie, seems rigged. But we’ll never know cuz they don’t show each bride giving each individual score… How convenient Valentina.
Valentina tied a wedding that cost half what hers cost, hope you enjoy your $35,000 trip to Belieze!
If Michelle wasn’t such a cheap host she would have won.
Lesson 1: DON’T CHARGE FOR DRINKS AT A WEDDING Stupid.
Danielle was the head bitch…such a complainer, and didn’t deserve anything.
Jen was nice but it is a wedding and hers was plain therefore the score resembled it.
So Valentina won, and probably the right choice even if she was not liked by the others.
Lesson 2: DON’T CHARGE FOR DRINKS AT A WEDDING stupid
Belize is a hell of a drug. And I’m pretty sure that Valentina doesn’t care that you found her mean since it got her to her dream honeymoon, after her dream wedding with her dream man. It’s a competition people. Stop crying about the women being mean and picking each other apart. Especially when you’re being just as petty on this website and don’t even stand to win anything for it.
I didn’t see the wedding planner in action, but by all accounts, she was/is a whore.
Actually I’m so disgusted with the whole thing. First of all you can’t penalize someone for being able to purchase what they would like. I believe that’s what happened. Yes Valentina won but I think these girls were just hating on her because she had the ability to get what she wanted at her wedding. If they had the ability to provide exactly what they wanted you wouldn’t be hearing all this foolishness!!! There never should have been a tie but if you thought low balling the score would have given you a better chance of winning do your thing and remember God doesn’t sleep. Anyhow Valentina I hope you enjoy your trip since they’ve labeled you a bitch just let them know that you’re the queen bitch that won the damn trip!
“Getlives” So, which are you: Valentina or her mother?
I thought Valentina was pretty funny…but your comment is too stupid to ignore. Everyone else is being “petty” by commenting on this, but you are being what? Wise? Voicing an opinion is valuable only when you, or the people who share your views do it?
She also didn’t sound like she’d so much as heard of Belize when she read the card. I think if it were her dream honeymoon it would roll off the tongue a bit better. I also doubt that anyone who has the cash to throw $70,000 at a wedding is overjoyed over Belize.
To all of you people who are delusional enough to think you know someone from watching an hour-long reality television show (INCLUDING YOUBLEWIT WHO SEEMS TO THINK THEY KNOW IT ALL):
Four Weddings Canada is a complete joke. This episode was so edited, it’s not even funny. They copied and pasted comments in different places to make people look bad. They hid certain things about the weddings and played up others ALL for ratings.
Take it from someone who has known Danielle for more than half her life. She is NOTHING like the “bitch” the person who wrote this article or the idiots bad-mouthing her here are making her out to be. She is one of the most loyal and giving people I know and she is loved by everyone who knows her.
You people know nothing about her. I hope you’re happy with yourselves and feel nice and superior sitting behind your computers, writing these horrible things about her. Funny that what you judge her on is a ridiculously edited, reality TV segment. She is beautiful inside and out. You people, on the other hand, make me sick.
You people should be ashamed of yourselves. Way to be informed before shooting your mouths off.
I have to admit… the responses to these articles ARE FAR more entertaining than the show itself. THIS right here, should be a reality show.
People, step back and look at all these comments over the past 10 articles objectively if you can. It’s a bunch of people going.. “Oh yeah!! well take this….. Oh yeah!! Well take that!… Oh no you didn’t!!…. oh yes I did!!… blah blah blah.. LOL. Pure TV right here..:D
I’m a personal friend of Jenn, and I mean this in the best way possible: With Jenn, what you see is what you get. Despite reality producers’ penchants for editing scenes, words and comments out of context, she still appears just as great of a person on TV as she is in real life.
My wife and I were also able to briefly speak with Danielle at Jenn’s wedding, and she didn’t come off as being bitchy at all.
To anyone who feels the need to provide negative commentary about these brides’ personalities, just realize that a lot of this is heavily edited to make for *snicker* compelling television. The fact that many of these brides are also playing to win only further increases the chance that they appear poorly on TV.
As for the “mermaid” dress, part of me thinks that all of those comments stemmed from some clever leading questions by the producers.
Don’t believe everything you see on TV folks…
… although Jenn and her husband Matt really are awesome people!
I agree with “Father”‘s comments. This was very dull and
boring…. and in my opinion the most lame episode. Now
episode 8, is a different matter. The most commented episode ever. Now Father and I have had a few
disagreements in the past, but today we are in sync.
As I have said before to Kevin: Never have a Cash Bar!
I agree with Father………. Something I haven’t done in all past episodes. Episode 8 has been the best of the season, and the girls all seemed to get along, without all the feigned interest. This one was monotone throughout, and
lacked excitement. As I have said before on a previous rant to Kevin, NEVER HAVE A CASH BAR!
Looking for more on Jenn? Check out her blog.
http://wtfimalmostthirty.blogspot.com/
I don’t see the big deal about having a cash bar. Why should the couple foot the bill for their friends to get wasted? I agree $9 is far too much for a drink, but it’s kinda selfish to trash talk a couple that doesn’t pay the bar bill. Just sayin…
I wasn’t planning to comment on TL, but now I totally feel compelled to. I’m Jenn from the show, and I feel super weirded out that someone posted in the comments as my alias Jendra and plugged my blog on here.
I’m not so horrified at the link, as my blog is hardly private, but I feel rather creeped out that someone is posting *as* me… I mean, I feel a bit violated in a way. That’s really not acceptable. It’s very easy to impersonate people online and I’d like to ask whomever felt the need to do so, to please refrain from doing it again. I don’t care for that one bit.
As for everyone else, thanks for the kind words. I didn’t expect to get 41.5, but after the initial shock, I’ve gotten over it. I never knew when I signed up I’d wind up in Toronto Life whatsoever, but I’m jazzed they liked me :D Aw, shucks, guys.
Also, someone asked why I’d sign up. Frankly, my first thought was “1/4 chance at a free trip!” I also didn’t consider a laid back ceremony would offend anyone’s sensibilities like it seemed to. In the end I went in figuring I could just be myself and see what happened and just try not to do the quiet reserved thing I do so often till people get to know me. That about covers it.
Oh, and the mermaid… ha! I was asked to describe the dress and it was 2:30 a.m. before they even got to me. I was like, it’s a mermaid style. “Could you elaborate? What do you mean?” “It’s a mermaid. You know, you’re a mermaid.” *Snort* It was late, I wasn’t at my brightest. Oh well!
Jenn you are awesome!! All the scores were low, more a reflection of the other brides being so picky. You did so well in a show that is clearly cut and pasted together to try and make the brides look bad.
This show needs to have the voting done by the viewers.
Bleh Bleh Bleh……why repeat what’s been said a zillion times. Yes we all know it was edited, yes we know it doesn’t reflect the person BUT they were real words and reactions from the brides and used to make a show. That’s how making a reality show is done. Cut and paste.
So, I will speak for my post. From what I saw, editing and all, my first post is what my opinion is from what I saw. I think it followed the articles premise and I am comfortable commenting honestly on people who chose to go on tv. That means they, and only they, allowed for themselves to be portrayed however the show wanted. The one they signed on for, the one that had a written contract stating this , and that the brides signed.
First off, i just want to say that women are catty – you are all proof that this is true.
The premise of the show is to judge people’s weddings. Yes, JUDGE. I feel that based on this premise, all of these ladies did that. The whole purpose of the show is a competition and im sure that 9 out of 10 of us would have done the exact same thing.. Cant stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen. Each bride signed up for the show knowing full well what it entailed. So again, they all played their part.
As a guest at one of these weddings, i will say that the producers almost tell you what you should be commenting on. So lets get serious here folks, reality tv is reality tv. For those of you who actually though that these ladies were captured at their 100%, then you’re the ones i feel sorry for.
Secondly, i will say that the best bride won. Fair and square, based on the votes, the scores and the brides themselves. All of you who wished for a different outcome were clearly not watching the show. I think Valentina’s wedding was well planned, well thought out and executed well. The decor, the dress, the food, the overall experience and the venue were top notch. Hers was the ONLY wedding that fit true to the theme that she was going for. From beginning to end and all the details in between. If anyone had an issue with the budget, then blame the producers for putting her weding up against lower-budgeted events.
Thirdly i think all of you, myself included, are petty in our own way for commenting about these weddings that all of these brides spent a lot of time and money to create. All of them did a great job and i wish them all only the finest happinesses in the world. But lets get serious. It was a competition that they all signed up for and, based on the premise and the scoring scheme … the best bride won. Congratulations Valentina and Brian and may your lives be filled with happiness (and baby-making) in Belize. God bless!!
How can you say Valentina’s wedding was the ONLY one that fit the criteria if you didn’t attend ALL the weddings. When you yourself hint that what is shown is what the producers want to be shown.
Sounds like you have a very strong bias, I’m sure we all do. Let’s just say that all 4 weddings were beautiful in their own way and that it was the perfect day for the couples that got married! Who are we to tell these brides their wedding sucked when it’s the day they dream about from childhood.
I wish all the couples a lifetime of happiness!
For: GETYOUROWN
Sorry, I had better things to do than check up on this post over the weekend so I only noticed your nonsense now. I’m neither Valentina or her mother. How many people’s mothers would call Belize “a hell of a drug’??! (Actually, maybe yours?) I just love getting people like you riled. And it worked. You’re obviously giving it a lot more thought than most – trying to get in to the psyche of how thrilled or not thrilled someone with Valentina’s bankroll would be to get a vacation to Belize. Why do you care so much? It’s neither your wedding, your show or your money.
So I go back to my original statement. Get a life.
This is addressed to everyone on this exchange…
Let’s all congratulate the brides for putting on beautiful weddings. I think our disparaging comments say a lot more about ourselves than we’d like to reveal. So let’s put an end to this and maybe take from this exchange what I believe should be apparent by now: these brides are all beautiful and deserving of happiness. Unfortunately, there can only be one winner. So, I congratulate Valentina and hope that everyone can do the same. If not, let’s teach our children that taking the high road is not always the easiest thing to do but it is most certainly the right thing.
Danielle…. are you “representin” and if so, how does it feel to be on the receiving end? Last time you posted on episode 8, you stated, and next week there will be four more, and the week after that four more, and one of them will be me. Doesn’t feel so great does it…. but it’s OK because you married your best friend in a retirement home, and from the looks of things you will be eating cheeseburgers well into the future. Just sayin!
Ha
Awesome.
Marianne,
This is the Danielle who was actually on the show – and for the record, this is the first time I’ve commented on any of the Toronto Life articles – so I have no idea what your talking about – I’m not “representin” anything.
As for my “retirement home” – it was absolutely beautiful and they were amazing on the best day of our lives. I would recommend them to anyone and I’m sure those people would have an amazing day as well.
And, cheeseburgers far into the future – what does that even mean. You sound like a fantastic person yourself.
You people sit on here and criticize four brides whom you have never even met. You make comments about how nasty each of us are, but you hypocrites are on here doing the same thing. At least we did it for an actual show and not just because we’re sitting at home bored.
I thank the people who have said kind words on here – and, to the others, all I have to say is that you don’t know me. You saw an edited version of someone like me. Like Jen has indicated further up- we were recorded for 15 hours a day and until all hours of the night. Things were taken out of context and things were cut and edited.
You may think you know me by the 40 minutes of television that you watched and think you can judge me – and that’s fine- bc I am content with my life – the fact that I married my best friend in a retirement home and had cheeseburgers at our midnight buffet. I am also content with the fact that I have a great job and a loving family, with a new addition on the way. I am happy – so go ahead and say what you will.
Both Jen and Michelle were great to be around on the show as well and I wish nothing but the best for them. I am sure they will live long and happy lives with Matt and Tyler who clearly mean the world to them. I’m sure that alot of the things they said were taken out of context as well and I would never begrudge them for that
We all knew what we were getting into when we signed up for this show.
Enjoy the rest of the episodes everyone!
…. Just read episode 8 comments… And, no, I am definitely not “representin'”…
Marianna….you were a joke on past posts, and a complete moron this one. You, and only you made yourself look like a lowest of the low in two minutes of post material. Representing had the right point, your on the show, u said the words, yes its edited, and YES it is anyone’s rout to comment how they wish. Do they have internet at the trailor park????
To
Real Danielle…. Sorry if it wasn’t you. Was just trying to make a point to her not to rip people apart as she did, about being on a reality tv show, and be big enough to take the criticism, as that is why the brides go on the show, to be judged. By elimination it appeared it was your episode, married best friend, budget, etc. Sorry again. I will leave it at that, as I’m sure she has seen the post. You said you read the comments on episode 8, I hope you understand, and accept my apology.
To hahaduhdumdum
You sure are dum dum dummbbb…… And again I say anyone can hide behind a name, yours sucks. Go visit your kin
and uncle/ grandpa at your favourite watering hole (trailor park you came from).
Marianne, you made yourself look like the dumb ass, therefore the name. Your trash because you spit out a post on a whim, to make a pointless point, make someone look bad, trash them and they have nothing at all to do with your pathetic self, then your apology is heartless, a….”ya, well I was trying to make a point, process of elimination, hope you understand, sorry garbage. Your point was wrong origionally, and no matter how you spin your first post to Danielle, you look the part of a trashy idiot by putting time in to try and figure out who a bride just might be to bash, looking like a tool in the process. So say what you wish to me, but you, and again, only you made yo self look stupid.
Hahadumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdu
Now you are sounding as stupid as CanadasGotBizshnits, a cry
baby from episode 8, who time and time again repreated his
opinions to bash woman was ok because they signed up for it.
You know what I thought of him and his weewee, too much
handling makes your brain waste away. Goes for you too!
Getlives:
I think it’s funny that you are simply amusing yourself by trolling, but the rest of the planet is doing something wrong.
All I could tell was that you were trash from your post, and didn’t bother to take a guess at your age…Thanks for clarifying!
GETYOUROWN:
Pretty sure that the other girl wins the fight when her last comment is still bugging you two weeks later. Maybe just walk away with some pride and stop fighting with strangers on the internet?
What was the song that Michelle did her (very beautiful) highland dance to?
What’s the name of Jen’s venue?