Four Weddings Canada, episode 1: Kraft Dinner edition
Four Weddings Canada, Episode 1
The new Slice reality show Four Weddings Canada follows four brides pulling out all the stops—and claws—to win a dream honeymoon vacation. Each bride will score weddings on the quality of the food, the venue and the dress, but we’re more interested in how awful these women are. Meet the inaugural cast: 24-year-old self-described “princess” Kristen, who plans to have (shocker!) a princess-themed wedding and hates mermaid-style gowns; 39-year-old Chantal, who is planning a soap opera–themed wedding and wears a mermaid-style gown, but hates cash bars; 21-year-old Jori, a country girl whose wedding has a cash bar and Kraft Dinner as a side; and Melissa, a 28-year-old aerobics enthusiast who is planning a traditional Latin ceremony and, turns out, hates Kraft Dinner. Check out who was naughty and who was nice (spoiler alert: no one) in our Brides Behaving Badly report card after the jump.
Many women want to feel like a princess on their special day; some want to feel like a princess all the time. Kristen is the most obnoxious bride of the bunch: her wedding features a shiny satin gown, a cash bar and chafing dishes packed with hors d’oeuvres that look like they came from the frozen foods section of M&M Meat Shop. These are the trappings of a true princess, naturally—Kate Middleton wishes her wedding looked like this. We see Kristen’s uvula at least three times as she yawns through Melissa’s ceremony. She was likely still tired from the stress caused by Chantal’s gown: “I just can’t get over the mermaid style,” she keeps saying.
Chantal is an image consultant and wardrobe stylist. In theory, that means she understands clothing more than most people; in practice, maybe not. She does her fair share of talking smack about the other bridal gowns, despite the fact that she can barely move in her own mermaid-style dress. Chantal is none too impressed with the environmental terrors of Kristen’s wedding, like the smell from a nearby farm, a waterfall and traffic. We were really excited at the prospect of her soap opera–themed wedding, but here it just means tables named after popular soap actors and a boom box blasting the theme song from The Young and the Restless. At the very least we had hoped for Precious the chimp from Passions to make an appearance, or maybe a possessed Marlena Evans impersonator.
From the get go, Jori is pegged as the Elly May Clampett of the bunch, and she’s perfectly content playing that role. She’s paying only $6,000 for her country wedding (after hers, the lowest budget is Kristen’s, at $25,000), and she’s asking all guests to wear cowboy boots. At other people’s weddings, she asks stupid questions like, “Do you think it’s inappropriate to fan myself with a Bible?” No, it isn’t inappropriate, but it’s also not very smart. A Bible is a thick book; waving it in front of your face will not cool you. Things in the church that might have made a suitable fan: a wedding program, a church bulletin, a fancy bonnet, Jori’s brain farts.
Melissa’s so boring that her wedding doesn’t even have a theme! She’s fairly pretty, fairly wholesome and fairly fair. She shows a modicum of bitchiness at Jori’s reception, where she complains about the food—but come on, it’s Kraft Dinner. Her lowest point is when she mucks up the one touching moment of the entire show: Jori’s fiancé says “wawfully” instead of “lawfully” because he’s nervous (aw!), and Jori plays along by doing the same (double aw!). But Miss Stick-Up-Her-Pants Melissa is not impressed: “You don’t want to make a joke of the whole thing.” Shut up, Melissa.
For baiting the other brides with free booze in hopes that they would grade her wedding mercifully and for her unreasonable aversion to Ariel, we declare Kristen to be this week’s Head Bitch in Ceremony. Take our word for it: she was unbearable.
(Oh, and Chantal won the honeymoon.)
40 thoughts on “Four Weddings Canada, episode 1: Kraft Dinner edition”
Will you be commenting on each of the episodes?
I hope not !
Your comments are not that great… I can’t believe i waste a few minutes commenting… but i am trying to save your job.
This article was hilarious!
All of the weddings were so awful that it was difficult to choose who lost.
Do the losing brides get paid anything for making fools of themselves?
EXCUSE ME!!!!!! I found this article to be VERY unfair here! Every one has there own opinion no doubt but are you serious here? were you there behind the scenes? were you there for the whole episode? NO you weren’t. It’s called reality tv ok. they edit everything to make more drama out of it to keep viewers glued to the tv. if anything i handled this extremely hard because they in no way did my wedding justice and when i commented to the other girls weddings, i was truthfully doing it in all honesty and i was trying to be very genuine about it….or sorry was i being to much of a “princess”!
Kristen, you weren’t a bitch and were right on the money. You should have won.
thank you so much for your comment Matthew :) its just hard to read things like this when im the type of person that does everything in my power to make everyone else happy and i think of other before myself and no where close to being a bitch. thats the last thing i wanted to portray on tv. so this article is hurtful. thanks again!! :)
This article was awesome!
Kristen unless they actually fed you lines, you WERE that bitchy. The best bride won. Cash bars don’t.
larissa thanks for your opinion. that is totally your call and again your entitled to your opinion. fact of the matter is you dont know me personally i think we were all being caddy and if you want to call it “bitchy” but drama is one of the points of the show. oh and i just to put it out there, i had a cash bar before dinner so people didn’t get to drunk. it was open bar all night…
Kristen, you dont have to explain yourself. None of the brides should feel as if they need to explain themselves. you all chose things for your wedding day that suited you and would make your wedding days complete. It is reality tv. viewers feed off the drama. If there wasn’t any drama you would not have articles like this to write or read. but thats what captures everyones attention. so chin up! Doesn’t matter what anyone says….you all just helped to make four weddings that much more entertaining to watch. it was hilarious
I’m not going to comment on the opinions of the brides or what may or may not be on the cutting-room floor (as all good TV is edited for a purpose) but I will say this about the show:
1) The show deviates too far from the original American series format to the point where it’s harder to follow
2) If everyone was nice to each other on Reality TV…NO ONE would watch it
3) I’ve been to hundreds of weddings in the last 10 years and out of all of them I’ve learned one lesson: NEVER do a cash bar with two expections! 1, you provide 2-3 drink tickets to ALL guests; 2, religious reasons bar you and most of your family from consuming alcohol.
@Larissa, the best bride didn’t win! Paying the most shouldn’t count for the most since the Soap Opera-theme was a flub.
@Kristen, congratulations! I don’t get the cash before/open after bar strategy, but as a cost-cutting method it does kinda makes sense. And I agree with you that the show feeds off drama and comment you for being honest on national TV.
They voted on each other, so barring producer intervention the four brides can only blame themselves for not finding the right balance of honesty and strategy.
Looking forward to seeing the rest of the season! :D
It’s hard for me to feel bad for how the ladies were portrayed on this show, or in the article. You can’t very well sign up to be on a reality show, especially nowadays when everyone knows these things are edited for maximum drama, and then be surprised offended when you’re portrayed in a less than flattering light. I mean come on, its not like “reality tv” is a new format – this is what they do. Drama gets ratings. Besides, the whole point of that show, from what I could gather from the promos was to promote bitchiness by encouraging the other brides to critique the weddings. It’d be hard NOT to come across as bitchy in that situation.
Like it or not, you signed up for the show, so you have own how you came across on it, for better or worse.
Besides, many brides, who are otherwise lovely people, can seem quite bitchy when their wedding day approaches and the stress builds. I’ve seen it myself and I can tell you, if I were in that position, I wouldn’t want a camera following me around during that period. Oh well, lesson learned for Kristen and the others I guess.
Chris, you took the words right out of my mouth!
I think the most ironic (and funny) thing is, one of the brides is getting upset for people critiquing her wedding when she is on a show all about critiquing other people’s weddings!
i was not upset about people critiquing my wedding. when people plan and have their wedding, they do it to their own personal taste. what I like, someone else wont like and so on. That’s what makes weddings unique. i am not expecting people to like my wedding, as long as i was happy with it, thats all that matters, just like the other girls. The only problem i had with this article was that i was named the biggest “bitch” when in actuality, we were all harsh to one another and thats not how i am. but that’s cool. its just based on what was portrayed on tv. thats how it goes.
I have to laugh at this. I am actually a Bride on a future episode and not only will I NOT google four weddings to see what people say about me but I can sit back knowing that I AGREED to be on a show that picks and chooses what they air and don’t air. At the end of the day the people at my wedding, myself and husband included, had a wicked time and appreciated my wedding for what it was …. If you’re going to be uptight about things … Being in a reality wedding show probably wasn’t a wise choice. If I look like a bitch on TV then I look like a bitch … I knew that going into it as did everyone else who agreed to be on it.
Bottom line, move on and enjoy being married.
This article was stupid and useless.
I think,this article not so important.BTW your cake topper looks really nice, I did a search and tried to find it but I’m not positive I found the same one.
I don’t know who would be worried about This Kevin guy’s job, being he really is not very good at it anyway. Hey buddy if you dont know these girls and what they are really like, I would not have such a strong opinion, but it’s media like yours that gives the media a bad name, you didn’t have many facts right on Kristen’s wedding but maybe you were a bit jealous of an outgoing personality and a sense of humor. were you actually there or just taking your toronto buddies word for your rude remarks
People who complain about the relvancy of articles need something better to do with their time.
And sorry Kristin but you should have considered something like this would happen. Part of the deal with reality tv is being able to not take yourself so seriously. You storming the comments board doesn’t prove to us that you’re not bitchy, it works against your case…
I think this article is hilarious and the show was overall pretty entertaining.
Anyone who signs themselves up to appear on reality TV should know better. They’re INVITING people(viewers, internet commenters and Toronto Life) to comment on their weddings and their personas. Chances are all of the brides have seen the original series and how those brides are portrayed.
Kristen is angry that TO Life called her out specifically as the Head Bitch. I can see how that stings, but keep it in perspective. It seems like this is going to be a regular schtick for them, seeing as how they took the time to make a bitch-o-metre. So in one week’s time, some other girl will have the honour of the same title.
Have a sense of humour about it. This is not a documentary about you as a person. A writer wrote this in the same cheeky vein that celebrity gossip websites dish out every day. One day you’ll show the tape/this article to your kids and have a laugh about the crazy reality TV/internet commentating times you lived through.
As a another future bride of this show with an episode coming up I am DYING to see what they do with me….I did them a favor and gave them what they wanted. They wanted someone who was blunt, funny, dramatic and a out right bitch and thats exactly what I was. I hope and can almost guarentee that I will get “Head Bitch” title and will wear it with pride. Just because you were a bitch when you were expected to be one doesnt mean you are one all the time. What you and your husband think is what matters and if you know the truth and that your not like that then eff the rest of them. Seriously its reality TV. It took me 4 tv shows to finally get reviews I cant wait
Kristen…. no worries.. we realize that the episodes are fully pulled apart on the editing floor. You do however have to realize that this is “reality” television. We wouldn’t watch half the stuff on television if they didn’t create tension or drama. We all have comments and unless everything is rainbows and sunshine the editors can cut your comments to make you look like THEY want you too! The unfortunate part to this Canadian concept is that the commentator makes the show what it is. It should be more of the brides doing the talking and commenting like the American version. It’s an oversite that Proper Television should have thought of…. sit back and watch how the other brides get twisted by editing!!
PS I don’t think the scoring on the show is legit anyways!
Proper television apparently has nothing to do with this as they are just the contract company Slice TV Has hired to shoot the show….Im sure slice is the one behind the editing
Kristen you are just a complainer, you said you did not like Chantal’s mermaid dress because it was puffy at the bottom, I guess you liked the whole skirt being shinny and puffy……which yours was.
Chantal’s dress was classy, and the fit was perfect. Don’t get upset at me Kristen, I know the truth hurts!!!!!!.
In all fairness guys, Kristen is being defensive for being called a bitch. And to that actual bitch who’s on a future episode and said she doesn’t need to google four weddings to see what people have to say about her, wait till your episode airs then come back and comment. My guess is you googled Four Weddings as well, especially being on a future epsisode. Everyone seems to have an opinion about everything. Yes Kristen signed up for reality tv but many of these comments are very rude and not necessary. I’d be defending myself as well if received this treatment, especially from a reputable publication. A 5 star chef will still be upset with rude comments no matter how successful they are. It’s human nature. Don’t worry about these comments Kristen. You’re better than this sorry bunch and to Toronto Life, stick to reviewing restaurants.
Well said Matthew Evans!
I still think I won! $6000 wedding and 3 week honneymoon in Florida. Even after all that it was $8000.
Even after you average all that out its %25 less than the others spent and still was the best day of my life.
Kristin! Calm down lady and stop googling yourself!!! I know just as well as you that none of the weddings really sucked… unless you think mine really sucked but I and all my guests had a tonne of fun so its irrelevant anyways!
I disagree that I have brain farts and I don’t think there is such thing as a stupid question. I was fanning myself with a book of hymns not a bible and it definitely is offensive.
I thought the show was hilarious. No joke.
It is reality tv and they take the dumbest, meanest, most drama filled moments and show them.
To whoever it was who said the show is so unlike the American version, you are right. Chantel did not deserve to win and it was purely by default of being the first wedding. Of course we’re going to be reserved at first… And of course by the end you’re going to be a total cut throat bitch. Big deal. I disagree however, that they didn’t do a scoring after all the weddings were done. This is what they do in the US and UK and the fact that the Canadian version didn’t is the only reason Chantel won.
I personally don’t give a rats ass that I didn’t win because who the hell wants to go on a little boat with 5-7 other couples? Not this girl! Plus with the money we saved not going bankrupt over our big day, got us to Florida for 3 weeks where we spent a week at Disney World, went to Universal Studios, did the Richard Petty ride-a-long at Daytona Speedway and we stayed at a nice hotel in Tampa and in Daytona both right on the beach!
I haven’t even watched it yet and I’m hooked.
Ok, first off, this article really blows up the bitch factor as these girls don’t seem like the bitches I know. Kristen, why respond, its dumb chicks hiding behind a post, I thought you were honest, just judging like your suppose to. I think Jori should have won. She looked the most relaxed and like she was enjoying her wedding and not the shows presence. NEVER..EVER HAVE A CASH BAR. Overall, no big bitch here, its so just what any person speaking on here would do while discussing others weddings. The point is to judge, are you a Simon Cowell or a Paula (spacehead) Abdul. Keep up the scrapping girls, this is better than the show.
I got the names wrong..Melissa should had won, not Jori(4th)
personally if the Canadian version wasnt going to go the same route as the other two US n UK then why not put 4 of the same types of weddings up against each other….I woulda rather had UNIQUE weddings to compete against rather then traditional
Put down the shotgun Pa, pass me the jug and meet me out at the cement pool and we will wish Jori the very best and will probably do so for many years to come while the others will be going to marriage and debt counselors and if they have any kids they will probably be living in a basement apartment and marching to save the world on my dime.
Here’s what I learned by reading this:
– Toronto Life sometimes has stupid articles. This was one of them.
– There is a television show about brides whoring out their wedding day for a free honeymoon.
– One of the brides from this show is so needy/silly that she is commenting on the article about the show.
Here’s what you should learn from my comment:
– a “caddy comment” is one made from the guy carrying your golf clubs.
– i have never watched the show and will continue to not watch such ridiculous television
– toronto life disappointed me with this article. you should have been “cattier” ;)
Kristen – I think your first mistake was doing the show in the first place. Is all this defending yourself and your wedding, plus being upset, really worth a free week in Cuba or the Dominican? You can find weekly vacay’s on travel websites for less than what all this post-bridal angst is worth.
Move on and focus your energy on a happy marriage.
Jori, your wedding rocked. Congrats on saving a boatload of money and being able to give yourself a great honeymoon. That’s way more admirable than showing how much money you can spend on a big party. I would have totally voted for you.
I have watched Four Weddings Canada and Four Weddings USA. On a scale of one to ten the Canadian brides rudeness rates at 9 1/2 for a bad, bad viewing experience to watch these catty nasty women tear apart rather than just experience the moment be it different from their ideal wedding. Their remarks were embarrassing. Canadian brides were dreadful and I ask, for what reason? The American brides are nasty too but I would rate them a solid 5 in nasty. I don’t understand why these women’s are so rude. Not everyone has a $60,000 plus budget either. These women seem so full of themselves. Will they one day look back on the experience and hang their heads with embarrassment? Who can control unwelcome bugs,hot days, unexpected rain, a late wedding commissioner or wind or cold. If one is unable to hear the bride and groom speaking at the alter don’t sit so far away from the action. If the wedding is a different culturally ethnic wedding, embrace the experience. I found some of the remarks by the brides catty and sickeningly unnecessary and would not waste my time watching this show again. I am married 46 years and would have been mortified if a guest made such rude comments and judgments on my special day.
AHAHA this article is entertaining as are the comments following. Kristen get over yourself. You signed up for a show that in it’s very nature is to scrutinize. In my opinion your wedding was tacky. It’s an opinion and as a viewer I am warranted an opinion, as is the author of this article. You put yourself on national television, give your head a shake. By the way, the other brides who WERE at your wedding gave you one of the lowest scores, so what does that tell you.
It’s just my opinion but I find cash bars to be veryu rude. I think it’s best to invite less guests if you can’t provide food and drinks without asking the guests to supplement the costs themselves. People are more than happy to bring a gift and that should be sufficient. You do not need to invite everyone you ever met to your wedding…and 25 is too young to get married if you are as silly as the brides on this show.
All I wanna know is where the hell they were for the winner reveal? It was gorgeous. In the American version they always put the name of the place on the screen. Can anyone answer this??
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