Eight Halloween costume ideas for the discerning Torontonian, from the Ikea Monkey to the Cronut Burger

Eight Halloween costume ideas for the discerning Torontonian, from the Ikea Monkey to the Cronut Burger

halloween-costumes-2013


halloween-ikea-monkey

Darwin, the Ikea Monkey

What you’ll need: Darwin is now going clothing free at an animal sanctuary, but you can revisit last winter’s media frenzy with a monkey ear headband and a cute shearling coat.
Extra Credit: You maintain a melt-your-heart abandoned expression the entire night.


halloween-flood

The Flood

What you’ll need: A cardboard mockup of a silver 2013 Ferrari California, and a brown sheet rigged up to some pulleys so you can “submerge” the car mid-party.
Extra credit: You spritz fellow revellers with a spray bottle of water.


halloween-walmart

Walmart in Kensington Market

What you’ll need: This one doesn’t require much to be scary: just wear a blue vest, greet guests with a smile and periodically say, “Welcome to the Kensington Market Walmart.” Chilling.
Extra credit: You buy a ton of Halloween candy and sell it at rock-bottom prices.


halloween-cronut

The Cronut Burger

What you’ll need: With enough Styrofoam, paint and maple-bacon jam, you can recreate the ill-fated treat that made headlines for its caloric excess, and then for its high bacterial content.
Extra Credit: Toronto Public Health tells you to go home.


halloween-ford

Rob Ford, Crackstarter Edition

What you’ll need: Just a hoodie and a glazed-looking smile. Obviously, a crack pipe would complete the ensemble, but we don’t want you getting in trouble.
Extra credit: You find the video.


halloween-rogers

A Rogers Wireless Customer

What you’ll need: A costume for the truly lazy. All you have to do is punch at your cellphone angrily and shout “Hello? Hello?” into the mouthpiece.
Extra Credit: You give up and switch to Wind Mobile halfway through the night.


halloween-bellwoods

Crackdown in Trinity Bellwoods Park

What you’ll need: Two people: one in a hipster getup, holding a beer and a frisbee, and another dressed as a police officer (preferably of the shorts-and-bicycle-helmet variety). The officer can walk around pouring out drinks and writing tickets.
Extra credit: You prevent an actual crime.


halloween-drake

Drake

What you’ll need: Copying the all-white look from the “Started from the Bottom” video shouldn’t be too hard. The finishing touches: assorted bling and this incredible makeup tutorial.
Extra credit: You get the white Bentley convertible he’s standing in, too.


(Images: flood, patrick; cronut, Gizelle Lau; Walmart, Walmart Corporate; Rob Ford; Trinity Bellwoods, Evan Davis; Drake, Chelsea Lauren/WireImage/Getty; Drake video, screenshot from Youtube.com; bicycle cop, Tsar Kasim)