Dear Wedding Diplomat,
My bridesmaids planned my bachelorette party but didn’t invite one of my close friends because he’s a guy. Instead, he’s supposed to go to my fiancé’s bachelor party, which will involve a trip to the Brass Rail strip club. He’s gay and has no interest in boobs; plus, I’d really like him to be part of my night. I explained this to my bridesmaids but they gave me the old “no boys allowed” spiel and breezed over the issue. It feels sexist to exclude him. Should I call them on it?
—Gender Defender, Yonge and St. Clair
Throw “sexist” into any argument and things get real. Don’t do it. These ladies sound well-intentioned, swept up in the bachelorette spirit and a little traditional. Let them know you’d like the stag and stagette guest lists to be determined by allegiance to the bride or groom, not anatomy. Then invite your guy friend to the party personally. Post-wedding, you can have your bridesmaids over for a homo-educational Glee marathon and toast the new normal.
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