Real Weddings: John and Ruth

Ruth Goodwin, an actor, met John Fast, a lawyer, on a trip to Calgary in 2019. They dated long-distance before John moved to Toronto to be with Ruth. After getting engaged in November of 2022, the couple was wed at a castle in Ireland this April. Here’s how it all came together.

Ruth: In February of 2019, I went to Calgary to visit my good friend Marita. She was working at a law firm, and she invited me to drinks with some of her co-workers. Marita mentioned that there was one guy in particular I might get along with. She showed me his profile on the company website. I thought he was very handsome.

John: As I was leaving the office to meet everyone, one of our colleagues told me that I needed to spiff up my attire because I was being set up. That colleague showed me Ruth’s IMDB page. I thought she was beautiful, so I quickly changed into nicer clothes.

Ruth: I never thought I’d date a lawyer, but right away I was charmed by John.

John: As we started to talk, I found out that Ruth was extremely bright and had a fantastic sense of humour. I was smitten. I remember feeling very nervous around her and a little intimidated, but I was having a good time.

Ruth: As the evening was ending, I could tell that John was kind of hanging around me. So I cheekily asked him, “Are you going to get my number or what?” He did, and our first date was two days later, the night before I had to leave.

John: We had drinks at a cocktail bar called Proof. It was the best date. Even though we were from different parts of the country and had totally different careers, we connected about so much.

Ruth: I liked that John was ambitious and driven. We shared a lot of the same values, plus we had great chemistry.

John: Ruth and I continued texting after she got back to Toronto. Soon, we were calling each other on FaceTime pretty much every day. About a month later, I made up some excuse about needing to visit Toronto for work. But, really, I just wanted to see Ruth.

Ruth: The first thing I said when I saw John was, “So, are we dating?”

John: I was relieved that she brought it up, because it was obviously on my mind. We agreed that we were dating, and our relationship became official. We had a great weekend in Toronto—went dancing at the Dakota Tavern and touring around town.

Ruth: After that, we continued our relationship long-distance. He’d come to Toronto and I’d go out west. We went to visit John’s family in Saskatoon and also met up in New York. It was lovely, but we’d always be sad at the ends of our weekends together.

John: I started making plans to relocate to Toronto for the summer of 2020. Luckily, my law firm has an office there. But, before I could move, the pandemic hit.

Ruth: I was in Calgary visiting John and performing in a comedy show when the first lockdowns happened. By April, John and I decided that he’d come to Toronto earlier than planned. He moved into my apartment in the west end.

John: We learned a lot about each other during lockdowns. We’d gone from long distance to social isolation together, which is quite the relationship leap. But I got to see how much fun Ruth is to be around. She often handles difficult situations with humour. I appreciated her ability to take a deep breath and make a joke.

Ruth: John is very laid back and down for anything. I love that he doesn’t take himself or the world too seriously. He has a really good compass for what matters in this life. John: While we were dating, the topic of marriage came up, but I was pretty agnostic about it. At the time, I didn’t have strong views either way.

Ruth: I never thought I would get married. I just didn’t have any interest in it for the longest time. But something shifted after the pandemic. I felt so lucky that our friends and families were in good health, and I reflected a lot on how much those connections really meant to us. The ability to declare your love for each other in a room full of people you care about is such a privilege.

John: My views changed too. It would be fair to say Ruth catalyzed it, but getting married made a lot of sense for us. It felt like an important milestone.

Ruth: I told John that if he was going to propose, he should consult some of my friends on the ring.

John: I understood the assignment. One of Ruth’s old friends helped me pick out an antique ring from Cynthia Findlay antiques. It’s from the 1950s and has a sapphire stone in the middle, plus two diamonds on the band. It’s somewhere between Edwardian and art deco style.

Ruth: In November of 2022, we took a weekend to visit Langdon Hall in Cambridge.

John: I figured it was the perfect spot to pop the question, so I called ahead, and their staff suggested a few good places to propose. The plan was for me to sneak out and pick the best one.

Ruth: When we got to Langdon Hall, I immediately took a nap. I was quite burnt out from a show I was working on.

John: It was perfect timing. I chose a quiet outdoor spot, and the staff made sure to have a bottle of champagne ready for us.

Ruth: When I woke up, John told me the hotel had a pre-dinner cocktail hour outside for all the guests. I was rushing to get ready because I thought we were going to be late. Once we got there, I saw that they had all these fairy lights up, but there was no one else around. Then John got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. I was overcome with emotion.

John: Ruth was crying so much that it took a minute or two to get a rock-solid “yes” out of her. Then we sat under the stars for a while.

Ruth: We got started with wedding planning after the holidays, in early 2023. We looked at venues in Toronto, Saskatoon, Calgary and Ireland. My mom is from Ireland, and she’s one of seven siblings, so we have a lot of family there.

John: That August, Ruth and I were in Ireland for her cousin’s wedding. We visited a few places, and in the end we landed on Bellingham Castle. It was built in the 17th century and has been lovingly restored. The grounds are beautiful, and there’s a river that runs through the property. It’s also close to Dublin, so our guests could easily get there from the airport.

Ruth: We wanted a date close to St. Patrick’s Day, in case some of our guests wanted to check “Paddy’s Day in Ireland” off their bucket lists. So we booked the wedding for April 1, 2024.

John: Another thing that is unique about Bellingham Castle is that your guests can stay overnight. We thought that would be a special experience and would entice people to come.

Ruth: We knew it was a big ask for people to make the trip, so we wanted to make it a night to remember.

John: Ruth is the tastemaker of our pair. For my suit, she suggested we book an appointment at Atelier Munro. We picked out a really lovely navy-blue tuxedo with a white shirt.

Ruth: I tried on dresses at a few bridal shops in Toronto, but I couldn’t find anything I liked. I’ve always been a fan of second-hand clothes, so my mom and I went to a consignment store in Summerhill called the Cat’s Meow. I fell in love with a vintage Armani dress that was champagne coloured and sleeveless. I got a fantastic tailor at Lady Needle to add spaghetti straps and adjust it to my body. I also got a dress for the reception from the same store—a twirly Marilyn Monroe–style dancing dress straight from the 1950s.

John: The day before the wedding, we invited our guests to go golfing by the Irish Sea.

Ruth: Then we had our rehearsal dinner at a pub, followed by a trivia night that we made up ourselves. The prize was the opportunity to make a speech at the wedding or, if the winner didn’t want to speak, they could assign a speech to anyone they wanted. It got pretty competitive. It was such a great way for our Irish and Canadian guests to meet and mingle before the big day.

John: The morning of, we each got ready in one of the cottages on the castle property. For me, it was very smooth and calm.

Ruth: The bridal cottage was organized chaos. John’s mom and my bridesmaids helped assemble our bouquets in between getting their hair and makeup done. Everyone was in good spirits. I felt a little nervous but mostly excited.

John: There was a brief window of warm weather that afternoon, so we took advantage of it and did the ceremony outside in a little courtyard. It was near a garden with a bunch of trellises.

Ruth: The castle had these massive Irish wolfhounds roaming the premises, which everyone loved. My mom and dad walked me down the aisle. I was just trying to be as present as possible.

John: As soon as Ruth was at the altar with me and holding my hand, I was immediately at ease.

Ruth: We incorporated some Irish traditions into the day. We did a handfasting ceremony, where our hands were tied together with a ribbon to symbolize our union. My wedding ring was a Claddagh, a traditional Irish ring that my grandmother had given my mum when she was my age. We passed our rings around the audience so that everyone could put some well wishes into them.

John: After the ceremony, Ruth and I were whisked off to a library in the castle. We got 20 minutes to ourselves to take everything in and have some Guinness. Our guests had a few drinks, and then we all moved into a reception hall for dinner.

Ruth: Because of the location, we didn’t have to do much in terms of decor. It was already such a beautiful spot.

John: There was a dinner menu where people could order their choice of beef, fish, chicken or a veggie dish. A few Canadian guests noted all the different potato options: roasted, scalloped, mashed, fried. People said it was very Irish.

Ruth: For the reception, we had a band playing covers and Celtic music. We also did a céilí, which is like Irish step dancing. Everybody was up and having a ball. It was so much fun.

John: We kept going in the main reception hall until about 2 a.m. before Ruth ran out of juice and went to bed. But the castle had opened up a second bar, which was more like a pub, and about 80 of our guests kept drinking and hanging out there until 4:30 a.m. It was a lot of fun.

Ruth: By the end of the day, I was exhausted, but I was also feeling so good.

John: I was on cloud nine. It was one of the most meaningful and fun days of my life, and I’d been surrounded by people who support and love us.

Ruth: Having our relatives and friends from Saskatoon, Calgary, Toronto, Ireland, England and the US come together was a once-in-a-lifetime moment. I don’t know how you could have that kind of turnout and not feel so grateful.

John: The day after the wedding, Ruth and I drove down to Glendalough, just south of Dublin, to start our honeymoon. Then we flew from Dublin to Portugal and eventually to Paris. We were travelling for two weeks.

Ruth: Being married feels great. It’s fantastic. It’s really just the best.

John: We’ve had a great first summer of married life.

Ruth: We got a puppy. His name is Pax, and he’s a whippet.

John: It’s the first milestone of many that we’ll have together.

Cheat Sheet

Date: April 1, 2024 Photography: Val Zukowski Videography: Michael Black Venue and catering: Bellingham Castle Officiant: Ruth Scott Florist: Bellingham Blooms Cake: McCloskey’s Bakery Bride’s hair: Michelle O’Halloran Bridesmaids’ hair: Mags O’Brien Bride’s makeup: Lisa Redmond Bride’s and bridesmaids’ nails: Haven Holistic and Beauty Bride’s dress: Vintage Armani from the Cat’s Meow Consignment Boutique Bride’s dress tailoring: Lady Needle Bride’s lashes: Effortless Beauté Groom’s tuxedo: Atelier Munro Band: The Mad Ass Mules