Oh my goo-ness: Cadbury poised to egg downtown Toronto

It’s like an advent calendar gone horribly wrong: a giant Cadbury egg above Yonge-Dundas Square counts down to Easter by inching closer to a revving fan. The sugary orb sits at one end of a balance; a box collects rain (59 millimetres so far) at the other end, slowly gaining in weight. This countdown, however, doesn’t end with a chocolate Santa; it ends with faux-yolk “goo” flying everywhere.

Cadbury’s Release the Goo campaign might take the cake on gimmicky, eye roll–inspiring marketing schemes. Sure, the exhibition-style space at Yonge-Dundas Square could use some more performance power, but a sticky explosion of oozing gunk may be too literal an interpretation of “smash hit.” The eye-catching ad went up February 24 and looks more like a metaphor for Bay Street than an encouragement to buy chocolate. The weather centre concept makes the timing of the impending splatter uncertain, but a goo shower is looming; the weight of precipitation has now pushed the egg far enough upward to switch on the fan.

As curiosity-killed-the-cat intrigue mounts, it’s hard to imagine crowds gathering below the enormous egg (in the rain) with anticipation, mouths gaping, to await a sloppy shower of liquid confection. If the Stay Puft marshmallow man in Ghostbusters taught us anything, it’s that candy slime isn’t something that should be unleashed on downtown streets—and it’s certainly not anything worth waiting for.