The Scotiabank Theatre’s escalator is broken for TIFF and everyone is freaking out

The escalators at the Scotiabank Theatre are four or five storeys tall. They’re scary to ride. They’re also, aside from a small elevator, the easiest way to get to any of the multiplex’s auditoriums, all of which are located on the top floor of the building.

Those escalators aren’t working today, which ordinarily would not rate a mention on this or any website. Except: the Scotiabank happens to be hosting a bunch of press and industry screenings during TIFF—so, basically, our Hollywood guests are being forced to take the stairs. Here’s how Twitter is handling this national embarrassment.

It appears the Scotiabank escalators have been malfunctioning for several weeks. And yet we ignored the warning signs, like fools:

With a few days to go before the fest, the escalators were still stationary, leading some to wonder if film critics would actually be asked to climb entire flights of stairs. It seemed incredible:

Some made constructive suggestions:

Others marvelled at the immensity of the task at hand:

Oh yeah, and there was a Hollywood Reporter article:

Yup, that’s a broken escalator alright:

CTV’s Richard Crouse griped about the griping:

Have no doubt that this no-escalators situation ranks very low on the Tomatometer™:

Or maybe it’s all a ploy to cull the weakest and slowest film critics from the herd: