Battle of the Blades, Season 2, Episode 2: the good, the bad and the snuggly
What were we giving thanks for this weekend? Canadian reality TV, of course. Sadly, all of our undying adoration wasn’t enough to keep the NHL’s number one enforcer Georges Laraque in figure skates. The BOTB’s gentle giant, with partner Annabelle Langlois, got the boot last night, and because of the Thanksgiving holiday, we weren’t able to weigh in before hand.
For today’s post, we’ll stick to our established format: who stays, who goes and who needs to get a room. We should note that the “get it on” category was particularly tight this week given the “Bringing Sexy Back” theme. Not sure if they stash a hose back stage, but some of these couples could have used it.
Who should stay: Val Bure and Katia Gordeeva
Last week we thought these two were safer than abstinence after a routine that made them look as good as Eddie Van Halen at an amateur jam night. Who would have guessed that the Canadian voters would be cooler than chilled vodka when it came to supporting BOTB’s only Russian pair? This week, the duo performed elegant lifts and one incredibly advanced double throw as if they’d been skating together their entire lives. (Plus, we figure if Bure stays in the competition long enough, his wife, Candace Cameron Bure, is sure to make an audience appearance.)
Who should go: are we allowed to say co-host Kurt Browning?
His little behind-the-scenes skits might be the cringiest thing to hit Canadian TV since Miley hosted the MMVAs. Speaking of cringing, were we the only ones squinting to avoid the nuclear glow of Kurt’s purple dress shirt? We actually watched all the way through the credits to see if we could figure out who is to blame for his wardrobe. We couldn’t, but whoever it is should be ashamed.
The runner-up in this category is Kelly Chase. The wing man’s skating was much improved this week, but those leaden shadowboxing maneuvers and ta-daaa! gestures have got to go.
Who should get it on: Patrice Brisebois and Shae-Lynn Bourne
Who should get it on? More like who did get it on five minutes before they stepped on the ice? These two were seriously oozing sex—the lightening fast footwork and lifts felt a lot like foreplay. (We’re not the only ones who thought so. To quote judge Jeremy Roenick: “I actually had drool coming out of my mouth watching that.”) We’re pretty sure Patrice is a family man (we’re just having fun here), but let’s just say that if the goal was to bring sexy back, Patrice and Shae-Lynn can consider week two’s mission accomplished.
(All images provided by the CBC.)
Who should go: are we allowed to say co-host Kurt Browning?
His little behind-the-scenes skits might be the cringiest thing to hit Canadian TV since Miley hosted the MMVAs. Speaking of cringing, were we the only ones squinting to avoid the nuclear glow of Kurt’s purple dress shirt? We actually watched all the way through the credits to see if we could figure out who is to blame for his wardrobe. We couldn’t, but whoever it is should be ashamed.
The runner-up in this category is Kelly Chase. The wing man’s skating was much improved this week, but those leaden shadowboxing maneuvers and ta-daaa! gestures have got to go.
Who should get it on: Patrice Brisebois and Shae-Lynn Bourne
Who should get it on? More like who did get it on five minutes before they stepped on the ice? These two were seriously oozing sex—the lightening fast footwork and lifts felt a lot like foreplay. (We’re not the only ones who thought so. To quote judge Jeremy Roenick: “I actually had drool coming out of my mouth watching that.”) We’re pretty sure Patrice is a family man (we’re just having fun here), but let’s just say that if the goal was to bring sexy back, Patrice and Shae-Lynn can consider week two's mission accomplished.
(All images provided by the CBC.)){kind=link}
Well Craig Simpson was a family man too, so that doesn’t mean anything does it, now that he left his wife for Jamie Sale. It was widely put out there that Jamie and David were separated so that people would believe that Jamie didn’t leave her marriage, but having been split up for the first part of 2009 after David’s affair with Tessa Virtue came to light, the 2 of them were very much reconcilled and back in the marriage when Craig Simpson came along. Everybody in Battle of the Blades knows this, so I’m sure the hockey players and their wives are being vigilant!
Blah blah blah blah blah. Isn’t that Sale/Simpson lowbrow gossipy crap talked to effing death already? It’s none of my bidness, and none of yours either. Ick. Ick. Ick.
Oh, get over yourself true. I thought there was supposed to be MORE behind the scenes gossip this year. bring it on!!
Are we not watching to see who can learn to skate together the best ? I didn’t know anything about the Jamie/ Simpson thing and it spoils it to be gossiping instead of focusing on the skating performance. Vote for the best improving skaters and forget your petty low-life interests in who’s with who . At least don’t spread it all over the internet and spoil the sport for all of us .