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Dear Urban Diplomat: Can you slap your friends with invoices for a fun weekend at the cottage?

By Toronto Life
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(Image: Anthony van Dyck)
(Image: Anthony van Dyck)

Dear Urban Diplomat, I invited a crew of friends and their kids to my cottage last weekend. They brought snacks and lunches, but I supplied most of the booze, some top-notch steaks and salmon, and gas for the boat. I even rented a water trampoline. At the end of the weekend, I divvied up the cost and emailed everyone, asking for $60 each. So far, no one has paid up. We all enjoyed the weekend. Am I totally off base to expect that we all share the cost? —Equal opportunist, LAWRENCE PARK

You’re so far off base, you’re practically in the outfield. You cannot, by any stretch of hospitality etiquette, slap your friends with invoices. You’re hosting, not running all-inclusive resorts. There’s no doubt entertaining is expensive, but keeping a ledger defeats the point of going to the cottage, which is to relax and have fun. It’s also extremely tacky. Either declare it a BYO-everything affair up front or abandon your inner Ebenezer and foot the friggin’ bill.

Send your questions to the Urban Diplomat at urbandiplomat@torontolife.com

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