Dear Urban Diplomat: should I tell my friend her boyfriend is on Tinder?
Dear Urban Diplomat,
I use the Tinder app to find eligible guys in my area. Last week, up popped my friend’s long-term boyfriend. His profile said he was “looking for a hookup.” I know they’re not in an open relationship. Should I tell her? If so, how?
—Bait and Snitch, St. Clair and Spadina
First, are you absolutely sure you have your facts straight? It’s possible that the Tinder profile was put up by someone using a pilfered photo. It’s also possible that they have an open relationship but don’t care to share that information with everyone they know. Assuming she’s a close friend and you believe he’s guilty beyond all reasonable doubt, you should spill the beans. Equip yourself with a screenshot, then meet at your place or somewhere she can cry or swear or hurl stuff without judgment. Present just the facts, and don’t make assumptions in case you don’t know the whole story. And whatever you do, don’t insult the guy. If they eventually patch things up, you could end up being the one who gets burned.
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