Dave Foley allegedly owes $500,000 that he just doesn’t have

Comic Dave Foley is back on the stand-up circuit in the United States, but he won’t be taking the act to his native Toronto anytime soon. Allegedly, Foley owes about $500,000 in child support to his ex-wife, Globe and Mail columnist Tabatha Southey, with whom he has two teenage sons. As Foley succinctly put it via Twitter in December, “Family court in Ontario ruled I have to pay 1st wife 3X my monthly income or go to jail because I used to be rich.”

Foley fears legal action because Ontario’s Family Responsibility Office has an enforcement order and jail time waiting for him due to his continued missed payments. The Kid in the Hall was spared jail time in November 2010 by making a $20,000 payment (according to Pop Eater, he had to borrow the cash from his brother), but that is just a drop in the bucket. According to the Toronto Star, Foley is supposed to pay $17,301.30 per month: $10,700 agreed to in 2001, plus $1,601.30 to reflect cost of living increases and a $5,000 fee that is meant to help pay down the $589,000 total already overdue.

While Southey’s lawyer, Jacqueline Mills, maintains that Foley’s child support debts began while he still had a large income, Foley spoke out against this idea on Marc Maron’s WTF podcast in February. Foley jokes that his current foray into stand-up is “court ordered” and goes on to explain an Ontario judge’s recent ruling that Foley’s inability to pay is not relevant to his obligation to pay. He also pokes fun at the judge’s decree that Foley’s death would not be considered a material change to his circumstances, thus warranting changes in the child support agreement.

“I called Kevin [McDonald]. I said, ‘If I die, you have to take my corpse out on the road,’” Foley joked. “You’ve got to be out there doing another restaging of the of The Odd Couple, but this time Oscar’s dead.” Foley also said he’d be happy to give away half of his earnings, but is unable to meet the price demanded of him by the Ontario government. He told the Toronto Star, “My income has dropped in the last 10 years, as anyone can tell from the number of shitty movies I’ve been in. I’m not exactly picking and choosing my projects.”

Considering Foley’s IMDB page lists his recent projects as Vampires Sucks, a stint on Desperate Housewives and the voice of “Randall the Goose” in Goose on the Loose, we’re inclined to believe him.

• Comedian Dave Foley fears arrest, owes $500, 000 in child-support [Toronto Star]
• The ‘Kid’ Is Not Alright: Dave Foley in Dire Straights [Pop Eater]
• Kids in the Hall member Dave Foley claims he can’t afford a return to Canada [Daily Brew]