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Black Watch: Today’s Top Stories

Not since Monty Python blessed us with the Gumby sketch, in which the main character announced over and over again “my brain hurts,” have we seen comedy like this.

On the same day she announced that she made somewhere between $600,000 and $900,000 a year at Torys, Beth DeMerchant also declared that she gave cruddy advice to Conrad Black et al. because her “brain connection was not functioning.” That same affliction took hold of a partner from Cravath, Swaine & Moore, who, when asked repeatedly how much money he made, skirted the question so deftly that his interlocutor, Michael Schachter, simply gave up, saying, “I guess if you have to ask, you can’t afford it.” This, in turn, led Mark Steyn to complain that he doesn’t make enough money. Now my brain hurts.

And speaking of which, Star man Rick Westhead’s report that Conrad Black called the prosecutors “Nazis” made the Guardian media diary. I wonder if Eddie’s system of fines for his Lordship’s use of polysyllabic mots justes extends to two-syllable slanders.

Trial focus turns to lawyer’s salary [National Post]Hollinger warned about non-compete problems in 2001 [Globe and Mail]Payments weren’t revealed: witness [Chicago]

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