Dear Urban Diplomat: My neighbours use our back alley for more than just access
Dear Urban Diplomat,
I’m sick and tired of my neighbours using the back alley like it’s an extension of their property. Their kids sell lemonade and play ball hockey back there, and one family recently hosted a wedding reception in their backyard that spilled out into the alley. I think it’s dangerous and irritating. Alleyways should be used for access, and that’s it. What can I do to stop them?
—Neighbourly Naysayer, Greenwood-Coxwell
On the list of Dangerous and Irritating Alley Activities in Toronto, hockey playing, lemonade selling and wedding revelry rank well below more troubling local phenomena like al fresco prostitution, crack dealing and feral cat orgies. Instead of thwarting the fun, I’d suggest splurging on a cup of lemonade and extending your belated best wishes to the newlyweds. If you’re dead set on killing the Jane Jacobsian buzz, you can request that Transportation Services install a “Ball and Hockey Playing Prohibited” sign, which the kids will promptly ignore. That, or they’ll fill the void with a new pastime: egging your house.
Send your questions to the Urban Diplomat at urbandiplomat@torontolife.com
![](http://www.facebook.com/sharer.php?u=https://torontolife.com/city/urban-diplomat-alleyway-etiquette/&title=Dear Urban Diplomat: My neighbours use our back alley for more than just access&picture=https://torontolife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/june12UrbanDiplomatAlleyway.jpg&description=[caption id="attachment_145297" align="alignleft" width="292"] (Image: Paul Schadler)[/caption]
Dear Urban Diplomat,
I’m sick and tired of my neighbours using the back alley like it’s an extension of their property. Their kids sell lemonade and play ball hockey back there, and one family recently hosted a wedding reception in their backyard that spilled out into the alley. I think it’s dangerous and irritating. Alleyways should be used for access, and that’s it. What can I do to stop them?
—Neighbourly Naysayer, Greenwood-Coxwell
On the list of Dangerous and Irritating Alley Activities in Toronto, hockey playing, lemonade selling and wedding revelry rank well below more troubling local phenomena like al fresco prostitution, crack dealing and feral cat orgies. Instead of thwarting the fun, I’d suggest splurging on a cup of lemonade and extending your belated best wishes to the newlyweds. If you’re dead set on killing the Jane Jacobsian buzz, you can request that Transportation Services install a “Ball and Hockey Playing Prohibited” sign, which the kids will promptly ignore. That, or they’ll fill the void with a new pastime: egging your house.
Send your questions to the Urban Diplomat at urbandiplomat@torontolife.com){kind=link}
geez. grumpy sod.
My alleyway is full of hookers and johns. I am more worried about the dog eating a used condom than kids selling lemonade. Can I trade you neighbours?
Stop being such a spoilsport. Seriously, this back alley sounds quaint. The alley is shared space, and not your personal property. If you don’t like how your neighbours use it, I suggest you move somewhere with your own private driveway.
God I hate people like the author of this post. Buy a fkng private island and move away from people.