The No-Politics-Allowed Candidate Questionnaire: Eglinton-Lawrence

The No-Politics-Allowed Candidate Questionnaire: Eglinton-Lawrence

A handful of Toronto ridings are way too close to call. For those who can’t make up their minds on the basis of the issues, we present the ultimate tie-breaker: a questionnaire in which the front-runners answer questions on just about every topic other than politics—the theory being that if their policies haven’t won you over, perhaps their personalities will.

Joe Oliver and Marco Mendicino

Joe Oliver
(Conservative, current vote projection*: 35.7 per cent)

Marco Mendicino
(Liberal, current vote projection*: 46.5 per cent)

What’s your most impressive trait?

Oliver: I don’t want adjectives and adverbs. I want data.

Mendicino: I’m curious. I love to listen and learn.

Your worst?

Oliver: See above.

Mendicino: I’m often in a hurry.

How much do you usually tip?

Oliver: I like to be generous.

Mendicino: I usually try to give 20 per cent. There’s a great local pub that I go to with a bunch of local buddies every week where we frequently tip more. Shout out to Bistro on Avenue.

When was the last time you experienced joy?

Oliver: When Eve Adams crossed the floor…and announced she would run in Eglinton-Lawrence as a Liberal.

Mendicino: A cheeseburger that one of my best friends bought for me just before the stroke of midnight after a very long day. That’s random joy. Oh, and my wife and two daughters, every day.

What did you want to be when you were a kid?

Oliver: I wanted to be a doctor. However, I don’t like the sight of blood.

Mendicino: I was a huge Trekkie as a kid. I still am. Growing up, I thought nothing could beat becoming an astronaut. It will be very neat to sit in caucus with Marc Garneau.

If you could live in any decade, which one and why?

Oliver: The ’60s, when I spent a year studying in Paris.

Mendicino: I think about the future a lot, so I’d be very interested to see where we are in 100 years.

What Friends character are you?

Oliver: Chandler.

Mendicino: Didn’t Brad Pitt have a guest starring role once? I can’t remember his character’s name, but most certainly that would be me.

What’s your favourite vice?

Oliver: Ice cream.

Mendicino: Playing FIFA on Xbox with my younger brother and cousins.

If you had to survive on one fast food item for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Oliver: 967-1111.

Mendicino: Pizza from Trio on Yonge.

Who’s your role model?

Oliver: Margaret Thatcher.

Mendicino: My father.

Name a word you’re not sure how to pronounce.

Oliver: Retirement.

Mendicino: Otorhinolaryngologist.

What’s the last book you read?

Oliver: The budget (which was not fiction).

Mendicino: What’s Happened to Politics?, by Bob Rae.

What’s a slightly embarrassing fact about you no one knew until right now?

Oliver: I lip-synch O Canada because I can’t carry a tune.

Mendicino: I like many of the tracks from Disney’s Frozen.

What’s a bad day like for you?

Oliver: When my Blackberry crashes.

Mendicino: When I haven’t hugged my kids at least once.

What smartphone app do you use the most?

Oliver: Twitter.

Mendicino: Toronto Life. Duh.

What’s your favourite curse word?

Oliver: Deficits.

Mendicino: Not printable here.

What’s your favourite possession?

Oliver: My didgeridoo.

Mendicino: One of my favourite possessions is the Petrof piano my parents bought for me when I was young. I still love to play it.

What do you want your tombstone to say?

Oliver: I told you so.

Mendicino: Get back to me in 40 years.

Car, bike, or TTC?

Oliver: Car.

Mendicino: Bike.

Dog or cat?

Oliver: Dog.

Mendicino: Dog.

White or whole wheat?

Oliver: Whole wheat.

Mendicino: Whole wheat.

Ketchup or sriracha?

Oliver: Sriracha.

Mendicino: Ketchup.

Drake or Meek Mill?

Oliver: Drake. We plan to win Eglinton-Lawrence “Back to Back.”

Mendicino: Drake.

*(Vote projections from threehundredeight.com)