I accidentally slept with a Donald Trump supporter
My name is Diana. I’m a 27 year-old bartender. I met this guy on Tinder about two months ago, a few days after I’d moved from Toronto to San Diego. We’d been chatting for all of a day, and we agreed to meet at a bar in downtown San Diego. We were just going to play Big Buck Hunter and have some drinks. It was very short notice. We didn’t even exchange phone numbers.
He showed up at the bar, and he was super handsome. Like, really tall—six-foot-four or something absurd. We were wearing matching leather jackets. His Triumph Bonneville was parked outside. This guy looked badass.
So we had a couple of drinks, and played a bit of Buck Hunter. A couple things came up as we were getting to know each other. I was probing a bit because I knew he was from Texas, and I wanted to find out if he was a Republican, or a bad person. (Not that the two are necessarily one and the same.) It turned out he was pro-choice and an atheist, which was good. We disagreed on gun control, because he’d served in the Marines. San Diego is a big military town, so there are a lot of those types of people around.
But the night progressed. We went out to some other bars, had some more drinks, and he invited me back to his place. I was super excited, because I was really into this guy. We hooked up, and it was incredible. There was a lot face-touching and intense eye contact. He was cool as hell. I was completely smitten.
At some point I got up and sauntered over to his bookcase, because I wanted to see what he was into. I saw a few photos, and then a David Sedaris book that I love. I asked him about the Sedaris book and he said he hadn’t read it yet. But then, right beside it, I saw a book about Donald Trump. It wasn’t The Art of the Deal or one of his how-to-succeed-in-business books. It was In Trump We Trust, by Ann Coulter. So I asked him about it. I was like, “Ha ha, this is funny.”
And he responded, “Well, actually the guy raises some valid points. Mexicans are taking our jobs.”
Meanwhile I’m a Canadian expat who just moved to America. I pointed that out and he went, “No, no. It’s different.” Why? Because I’m white and in my twenties?
He started talking disparagingly about Black Lives Matter. This entire conversation happened in five minutes, while I was frantically getting dressed to leave. I wasn’t there to argue, and I felt deeply uncomfortable.
I got a Lyft home and I thought I was done with him. The next day he messaged me on Tinder. He said, “Hope you’re still not upset over politics LOL.” I explained that it’s hard for me to remain attracted to someone whose views are so different from mine, and who believes in bigotry and xenophobia—which sucked, because the sex was amazing.
Then he said, “Not accepting other people’s beliefs is the definition of bigotry.”
So apparently it was my fault.
He sent me a “hey” message a week later, which I never replied to.
I couldn’t do it again. It feels taboo to sleep with a Trump supporter. But here’s the thing: I’ve slept with a lot of people in my life. This guy ranked in the top five. I thought maybe I’d try him again one night at 3 a.m., when I was drunk enough to overlook his political views. But I couldn’t bring myself to do it.
I don’t want to wake up next to a guy who blames Mexicans for his woes and thinks “bigly” is a word, no matter how handsome he is.