The Weekender: Bob Saget, a pillow fight and five other can’t-miss events

1. BOB SAGET
Maybe it’s because we never missed an episode of Full House, but we’re torn between loving and hating Bob Saget’s 30-year career as a stand-up comedian. On one hand, the guy’s improbably funny. On the other, Danny Tanner gleefully telling dirty jokes? We’re scarred for life. Jan. 14. $39.50–$49.50. Queen Elizabeth Theatre, 190 Princes Blvd., 416-870-8000, ticketmaster.ca.

2. PILLOW FIGHT LEAGUE #62
Gentlemen, this is not your teenage fantasy come to life. Rather, the ladies of the Pillow Fight League are kind of like the ladies of that other fave team sport, roller derby—they’re the kick ass and take names types. World champ Dinah Mite goes head-to-head with Charley Davidson in the tag-team main event; also featuring Rose Thorne, Eva Dead and Kitten Kaboodle. Jan. 15. $12. The Garrison, 1197 Dundas St. W., gopfl.com.

3. RUINED
Set in a small mining town in the Democratic Republic of Congo, this Pulitzer Prize–winning play by Lynn Nottage makes its Toronto premiere next week, with previews starting on Sunday. It tells the story of Mama Nadi, the savvy madam of the cleanest, coziest whorehouse in town, as she navigates the complex civil war in DRC and profits from and protects her girls at the same time. Jan. 16 to Feb. 12. $15–$35. Berkeley Street Theatre Downstairs, 26 Berkeley St., 416-386-3110, canadianstage.com.

4. SILENT SUNDAYS: THE THIEF OF BAGHDAD
A Douglas Fairbanks production (the silver screen icon both produced and starred in the 1924 flick), this epic tale of flying carpets, invisibility cloaks and monsters is based on an Arabian Nights story about a thief who falls in love with a Caliph’s daughter. Acclaimed pianist William O’Meara provides the musical accompaniment. Jan. 16. $12. The Revue Cinema, 400 Roncesvalles Ave., silenttoronto.com.

5. CHRIS GUILLEBEAU (FREE!)
Blogger Chris Guillebeau’s first book, The Art of Non-Conformity, is about setting your own rules, making a difference and…world domination. Those last two seem a little contradictory, but we’ve always wanted minions, so we’ll be at Indigo for the Toronto stop of his Unconventional Book Tour. Jan. 16. Indigo, Manulife Centre, 55 Bloor St. W., 416-925-3536, chapters.indigo.ca.

6. UBER-SWAP
For some, the holiday gift haul wasn’t as complete as anticipated. (Take us, for example—we didn’t receive a single pair of Louboutins, despite our very detailed wish list.) To stave off disappointment, head to this mega-sized clothing exchange, organized by local boutique Nathalie-Roze and Co., where you can ditch your own gently used outfits in favour of vintage frocks, select new creations by local designers and second-time-around accessories. Jan. 15. $5 if clothes are dropped off by Friday; $7. Queen Street East Presbyterian Church, 947 Queen St. E., 416-792-1699.

7. WHEN SISTERS SPEAK
Some of the best spoken-word artists from Canada and the U.S. are in town for this, the 11th annual showcase of work by black female poets. Look out for Edmonton’s Titi, Buffalo’s Erika Haygood and Toronto’s own Motion and Keisha Monique. Jan. 15. $35–$45. Jane Mallett Theatre, St. Lawrence Centre for the Arts, 27 Front St. E., 416-366-7723, stlc.com.

(Images: Chris Guillebeau by Jen Lemen, Pillow Fight League by Tsar Kasim from the Torontolife.com Flickr pool and Bob Saget t-shirt by Elizabeth Skene.)