If only Don DeLillo were here

Standing in the middle of the phone camera orgy that was the Paris Hilton appearance at Ultra last night, we dug deep into our conscience to draw a comparison to a certain ENG101 class discussion about the Most Photographed Barn in America in Don DeLillo’s White Noise. Delighted by the postmodern absurdity of it all, we too scrambled to take low-quality photos of the most photographed woman in North America for our personal collection. Paris came, took a few sips of a certain sparkling-wine-in-a-can, smiled sweetly, and chatted with the DJs as a video montage of her sultry poses and various haircuts played on the video screens to the side. We were there. Our colleagues were there. Heck, even our editor was there. And we have the photos to prove it.—Melita Kuburas“