Grass-fed beef might be all the rage in Parkdale, but in down-­town steak houses, guilty pleasures are alive and well with artery-clogging, super-expensive, locavores-be-damned Kobe beef. Leading the charge is Jacobs & Co. (12 Brant St., 416-366-0200), where stockbrokers and stag partiers gleefully tuck into wagyu, a breed of Japanese cattle that originated in Kobe. Is it worth the splurge? We tried three of Jacobs’ wagyu options—Canadian, American and Japanese—to see how they stack up.

If, like Mrs. Sprat, you can’t stomach lean, the Japanese wagyu ($170 for a six-ounce California-cut strip loin) is for you: a major river of molten fat runs through it, thanks to a sedentary life of confined living and massage. But while it cuts like butter, only a client dinner could justify the expense.

Cast against type, the Canadian wagyu ($75 for a six-ounce tenderloin) oozes personality, with a bloody, almost ferric flavour. Flown in from the Rockies, it’s not exactly carbon neutral, but Alberta is a lot closer than Kobe.

The Idaho herd may not get massage treatments, but the cows do roam free. Riven with fat, Snake River’s meat ($94 for a 12-ounce American wagyu strip loin) isn’t quite as tender as the Japanese cut—but a happy herd makes for a cleaner conscience.