Dear Urban Diplomat: Should I call the cops on my neighbour’s pot-smoking offspring?
Dear Urban Diplomat,
I live on a nice street, surrounded by friendly young families, but the other half of our semi is rented by a mom with two troublesome teens. They apologize when we bring up the loud music on weeknights, broken glass in the alley and dog poop on our lawn, but they constantly smoke up on their porch. Now, if I ever open a window, my house smells like it’s been hot-boxed. I’m pregnant and have two kids, so the exposure is unwelcome. Should I report them—it’s illegal, after all—or find another way to discourage them while keeping things friendly?
—Pot and Bothered, Leaside
Nothing sours neighbourly relations like a police drop-in, so it’s best to go another way. Try prodding them toward a more agreeable weed-smoking ritual. Ask them (the kids, not the mom) if they’d kindly smoke on the far side of the house, instead of the porch, and remind them of the dangers of second-hand stoning for your kids. They might be shocked and start keeping their smoking on the down-low, or they might even go with your suggestion. But if they ignore you, shutting a window may be your only peaceful solution.
Send your questions to the Urban Diplomat at urbandiplomat@torontolife.com
What? That’s your answer, close the window?
Why not place a call to your neighbour, their landlord? Rents have gone up in the city and if you’re neighbour might appreciate the opportunity to replace the mother and her monster spawn with a nice young family like yours while collecting more rent.
Complaints from the nighbour are exactly what the landlord needs to get these people out of there.
I get that one should be trying to maintain good relations with a neighbour, but “shutting your window” is lousy advice. Gentle prodding might get results, and would likely result in a friendlier atmosphere among these folks, but in the event prodding doesn’t work, it’s not the pregnant woman with two kids who needs to make the sacrifice here. If the neighbouring teens don’t get the message, the pregnant mom needs to explain how she will assert her rights (i.e. calling the landlord, calling the police, etc.) to the neighbouring mom, albeit calmly and respectfully, and then exercise those rights if necessary.
Telling her to be gentle and then close her windows is weak advice, Urban Diplomat. Were you high when you wrote this?
I’d be more concerned with the broken glass, but pot smoke is certainly unwelcome.
I say approach the landlord and explain your situation calmly and cooly. Failing that, you should should consider giving the entire family some spankings.