Fifteen of the best Toronto-based missed connections on Craigslist

Fifteen of the best Toronto-based missed connections on Craigslist

"If only I could get you to notice me. I think we'd make a really great meme" istock

In an age when love is as easy to find by swiping right, a surprising amount of people look to Craigslist—even though the odds that one specific fish in the sea will read their post are next to zero. We’d like to give these hopeful romantics a hand. If you recognize yourself (or someone you know) in one of these missed connections, there’s still hope. Click on the relevant link to find love.

“I would like to apologize for spending 37 minutes in the bathroom”

DBar Saturday night (w4m)
“We had a chat & you got me a martini…
Told you I was going to the bathroom,
came back and you were gone.
I feel really bad & I would like to apologize for spending 37 minutes in the bathroom.”

“That car wash is in a creepy location”

Did you top up my car wash???? (w4m)
“I ran out of time on my car wash. Was looking for change and you noticed and put money in for me. I said Thank you. When I was done I went looking for you but you were gone. You told me your name but to be honest I didn’t hear because that car wash is in a creepy location, so i was a little spooked at first. lol. If its you send me a message. I kind of owe you one because that little bit of soap left would drive me nuts.”

“I remember the time you kicked me out for puking in the bathroom”

The Big Bop—25 years ago (w4m)
“The Big Bop—before they painted it purple. I used to go every Saturday wearing a mini skirt and usually hang out on the second floor. Occasionally my friends and I would go to the first floor and watch the DJ’s antics. You were the bouncer, you might have passed away by now, but from what I can remember (I was usually drunk beyond belief) you were ok looking. I remember the time you kicked me out for puking in the bathroom on the second floor….oh the good old days!”

“You were the hot blonde actor in the Escape Room”

Casa Loma actor escape room (m4m)
“You were the hot blonde actor in the Escape Room. You’re a stunner man. Didn’t really get the gay vibe but my gaydar is terrible. I was there with a group of male friends a couple of days ago. Not sure any interest but here’s a compliment anyway.”

“I saw you near my house on a bike vaping”

The house at the end of my street exploded! (w4m)
“Your name is Will and we dated years ago. You would remember the title of the post, as we had a great discussion at length about the house blowing up, we talked on the phone about scarves all the time lol and you would always tease me about wearing 2 bras at once. Great clues to hopefully help you remember me as this friendship was many years ago. I just saw you near my house on a bike vaping. I knew I knew you, but had to find the file in my brain moment! I did nod and say hi, possibly stared, my hands full of bags and a big black dog on leash. I think you were trying to place me as well, and waved your lighter in response. You look great!! Well you know where I live, so feel free to come knock on the second fire door if you are available too, or respond here. Hope you see this!! Please put the intersection in the response.”

“Msg me and tell me what significant protein you bought”

Anarchist at Loblaws (w4m)
“You tall, dressed in black, anarchist belt buckle.
Me tall, dark hair in a bun, behind you at cash out.
Hard to meet other anarchists in this town. Coffee?
Was going to say something to you but the cashier loves to talk…
Msg me and tell me what significant protein you bought.”

“We teased each other as we selected what to add to our burritos”

Bar Burrito Dufferin Mall (m4w)
“We teased each other as we selected what to add to our burritos.
I wanted to give you my number but was too shy. I know you said you work in the area but I’m not at the mall often so hopefully this will work. I thought you were funny, handsome and friendly.”

“Once you asked about the smoking cessation pack I had out”

Go Train fare checker—Lakeshore West (m4m)
“You’ve checked my tickets a couple times now. Once you asked about the smoking cessation pack I had out. We chatted a bit. I saw you again most recently. Damn you’re cute. Let me know if you’re interested. Let me know a brief description of myself so I know it’s you.”

“I was checking you out while you did the crossword in pen”

Banana hat on Line 1 (w4m)
“I was checking you out while you did the crossword in pen, and then asked you about it later. Maybe we can discuss your superior intellect over a drink?”

“You had an eyeball suit on”

Flaming Lips show (m4w)
“Hi, I normally don’t do this, but I saw you at the Flaming Lips show and I can’t stop thinking about you. I’m sorry we never had the chance to meet. I was the beautiful man with the big beard and grey sweater, and you had an eyeball suit on dancing on the stage. I’m not even sure what you look like, or if you’re even a woman at all, but your moves were captivating.
I hope to hear from you soon,
Billy”

“U once found a baby raccoon in the trash can”

Gummies in the fridge, baby raccoon (m4w)
“You lived in high park.
U had curliest full sexy brunette hair. I kept gummies in the fridge and u once found a baby raccoon in the trash can. Took a pic.
U were Brazilian.
We blazed a few times. I wish I stayed in touch.
I was from mississauga we came to my place…
Your name started with an A and I do remember what it is.”

“We cuddled and smoked weed a lot”

We cuddled and smoked weed when I went to college years ago (w4m)
“This is a long shot and a half… you were the only guy that I was able to cuddle with and fall asleep where I felt safe. There were never any expectations we never did anything more than sleep in each other’s arms… I miss it greatly… I don’t know what I’m trying to accomplish here but yeah … I miss you a lot I’m out in Alberta now we tried reconnecting when I moved up to parry sound but life was happening then and I wasn’t able to go meet up with you this was back in 09 the beginning of… I miss my cuddle buddy I really hope you see this but I doubt it…. I miss you Jason …I still think about you everyday and wish I had made the first move but we were both so shy and innocent back then.” —Sarah

“There was a man with an accordion on the train”

Brunette reading “Yiddish for Pirates” by Barwin (m4w)
“You got on at Lansdowne heading eastbound. There was a man with an accordion on the train. I think you caught me staring just as I left. This is a complete shot in the dark, but perhaps someone reading this might relay the message. In the unlikely event you do come across this, I’d be interested to meet for a coffee.”

“You said ‘babe alert!’”

McDonalds at Bloor and Ossington (m4w)
“You were number 261. I was 597. You said, “babe alert”. I was too shy to ask for your number. I wish I had…”

After you disembarked from your time machine in front of the Kitchen Table”

Health goth, King and Bath (m4w)
“After you disembarked from your time machine in front of the Kitchen Table, and realized your braids were tinted blue from the dimensional fatigue, you walked out in front of me as I was locking my cargo bike. I didn’t think you’d care about someone like me, who isn’t from the year 2076, but I looked up and you were staring at my trail runners and Adidas leggings. Caught ya. Get at me. Tell me next weeks lotto numbers.”